Vol. MMXXVI · No. 7 ·  
JerkCircle — Bold Satire. Sharper Than You.

Local

City Adds Bike Lane, Removes Bike Lane, Adds Public Meeting About the Bike Lane

The paint cost more than the meeting, and the meeting cost more than the lane would have saved.

By A Raccoon, City Desk · Filed July 16

The city completed installation of a protected bike lane on a busy corridor Monday, removed it Wednesday after complaints, and scheduled a public input session for the following month to discuss the lane that no longer exists.

Officials described the process as community-driven, noting that the meeting would feature a presentation, public comment limited to two minutes per resident, and a follow-up survey nobody would read. A representative for the neighborhood association said the lane had ruined the character of the street, which currently consists of a four-lane road and a closed bank.

The city confirmed that the paint had cost more than the meeting, and that the meeting had cost more than the bike lane would have saved.

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